IF THE HEART DOES NOT REALLY SHATTER WHEN IT BREAKS, WHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE IT?

"It'd be a privilege to have my heart broken by you." (c) Augustus Waters



[ Isn't this too sad for a first post? lol who cares?]

I've never been into a relationship because maybe aside from I'm too young, I fear a lot of things like being too happy, being hurt, being left and especially trying new things. But guess what, as I try to make a great escape, I hit the wall of the broken-hearted. I FELL in love for the wrong person and yes it's fell because Taylor Swift was right, everything that falls, breaks.
 ♥
 I don't like it, I'm already miserable and this brokenheart-thingy makes me even more miserable and lame and loser. I used to stay up all night writing sad poems or composing sad songs, and I don't like that because I have morning classes, I don't wanna come to school looking like a zombie. Sometimes, I also cry myself to sleep. It's like I'm pretentious 'cause when I go outside I laugh so loud but deeply, I'm crying and wanting to kill someone.

And the same night when I can't cry hard enough, I saw that table napkin in the photo above from the take-out food from my brother. I read the sentence in it saying, "This napkin is made with recycled material. At Jollibee, we care for the environment as much as we care for our customers." And because I'm depressed and currently having teenage angst, I feel like changing it so immediately I grabbed a pen and replaced some of the words of it, then it became, "This HEART is made with recycled material. At REALITY, we care for the STUPID PEOPLE as much as we care for our SHITS." This, somehow eases the pain I'm feeling. It's like everything I wanted to explain was perfectly written in a table napkin. My heart is made with recycled material, that's why it's fragile and it cares for stupid people. I wish this days will be over.

 ♥ yelalalove  ♥